4 weeks & 2 days since surgery.

8 Sep

Technically seeing as it’s 00:53am, it’s the 8th September & a month tomorrow since I had my panproctocolectomy. It’s amazing how different my life is now than it was 4 weeks ago, 4 months ago, 4 years ago…14 years ago just as I was starting with my Crohn’s before the age of 7 when I was diagnosed. If it wasn’t for my surgeons 4 weeks ago, I most likely would not be here to write this now, so I am forever extremely grateful, I have my life! 🙂

This week I have achieved many more things in my recovery and have been a lot more mobile. I’ve been taking short and slow walks into town and back to Tesco to buy food with my boyfriend for my recently found fantastic appetite & love of food (something I never thought would happen to want to eat food after all those years of hell and struggle and pain when I ate and putting weight on with steroids just to lose it all again and more), I’ve been spending way more time out of bed, helping with cooking, went on my first train journey post-op, enjoyed my first Cheeseburger since surgery from Burger King, had my first day out & continued on with the flat/house hunting for me and my boyfriend with my boyfriend & family that we started before I fell seriously ill a few months ago. I managed to sit in the car & enjoy rides out with my Mum, walked round Tesco & Morrisons with her in the past week and a bit for the food shop, & today we went to McDonalds Drive-Thru where I enjoyed a Plain Double Cheeseburger & Chicken Nuggets – Both which would have given me grief before my surgery for days on end. I’ve started planning things for a month or so’s time to do with my girls, I can’t wait, my life is getting much more back on track 🙂 Most of all, I have ensured I have rested when my body has told me, but also given myself a little push when my mind knows I can do it, I’ve been finding the balance between what my mind wants to do and what my body can cope with at the moment 🙂

My boyfriend and I, after much stress and many letdowns, have finally found our first place to rent, which makes me so content and stupidly excited! This means as from the 19th September I will be gradually moving in with him until I live with him full-time pretty much for University in the City where our flat is in September 2012 🙂 I will definitely do a blog for my boyfriend as he definitely deserves a mention, but words just cannot describe how much he means to me, through thick & thin he is there for me & cherishes me & loves me for the person that I am ❤

Going to see my Stoma Nurse this afternoon at 14:30, I have a feeling she will be really pleased again fingers crossed! 🙂 I have a little bump on one side of my stoma which has come up since I had my stitches out, it looks like a polyp and is the same texture as my stoma like the inside of our mouths and she said she doesn’t think it is anything to worry about, so will be finding out what is going to be done about that, probably frozen off or something or just maybe left I’m not sure, we shall see! Managed to put about 3/4 pounds on in weight since I left hospital around 3 weeks ago, so I’m hoping this will continue as I have quite a way to go before I reach a healthy weight – I will get there! 🙂

Hope everybody is well and has had a good week since I last posted 🙂

Everybody should be proud who has achieved even the tiniest of things, let alone those who have been courageous and continue to be courageous and brave every day battling illnesses and show positivity and the will to push through even the worst of times! Every single one of you is an inspiration. One person especially who has inspired me greatly is my good friend Meg Price, we only started talking a few weeks back, but she has given me much advice, strength and the courage to get through my down days. She has said many wonderful things to me which have helped me to feel happier when I have had my down moments, & she recently completed a 12k walk and raised hundreds of pounds for The Colorectal Research Fund & those with Crohn’s & Colitis. AMAZING. She is so brave & shows such strength & always manages to help others besides having her own problems to deal with. She is such an inspiration and I’m so glad to be in touch with her. Check out her blog: http://www.stanleystoma.wordpress.com 🙂

Night night everyone x

One Response to “4 weeks & 2 days since surgery.”

  1. Leslie November 27, 2012 at 7:43 am #

    OMG! I absolutely love your attitude. I am an old old woman lol at 51. I have had my Colostomy for about 18 or so years now. I had Crohn’s since the age of 25? Maybe longer but not detected by doctors. I swore I would never allow a colostomy bag. I felt putting up with pain and fistulas and poops galore would suit me better that a bag of poo stuck to my belly. My Aunt made the mistake of saying it is not a big deal. I was in the hospital and she asked the nurse if we could look at a little old ladies bag as she was pretty much out of it. It was huge and horrible with poop laying all in a see thru bag on her belly. Of course I didn’t want that. Who would? So I spent the next 20 years over medicating myself on everything from prednisone (which has made my bone all achy) to higher and higher doses of pain medication, until even the highest dose the could give would not work and then I over medicated on Xanax. The addiction became worse than the Crohns, although both were hard to deal with. Then one day as I was having a Colonoscope, the fellow learning to be a doctor punctured my colon an I was eventually rushed to the ER were the had to do exploratory surgery. I came out of the fog of anesthesia hearing the doctor tell my Mother the gave me a colostomy. I swear for the next 3 years afterwards I was in a black hole of depression and I treated my stoma horribly, ripping the wafers off angrily and wondering why I had such deep wounds. I continued to get wose on my pain meds and even resorted to buying them on the street. I was a Mom from the sofa, always thinking I had it worse than the rest of the world. Finally my husband and family could take me no longer and they put together loads of money and sent me to detox and rehab. I did okay in detox, though at the time I didn’t think so. After all that, I came back home and immediately started Narcotics Anonymous meetings. I am happy to say that I have only had to have narcotics 2xs for a week each for about 7 years now. I found out in those meetings that the little sliver of Hope I felt about enjoying my life again grew and grew until I sit here, being able to concentrate and loving my life. You have got to get out there and speak to people about your experience because I know many people are terrified of colostomies, when they could see it a different way, your way, as a blessing in disguise. The way you tell it, it is not even disguised. I still hide behind giant clothes and run away or hide from people because I think they will smell me. I have been very foolish to be so self centered. I know this. We all have our own journeys and even now I am trying to get myself back out the door to make a friend that I can share with, not on line, but in person. I wish you well. I have started at the beginning of your Blogs and am reading them thru like a book. I haven’t come to the bad parts, though I know you have bad days too. Thank you for showing us how to be brave. You ROCK!

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